Life and times of a pussycat this is useless rambling of a bored college student...this is where i vent!

Friday, April 05, 2002 :::
this damnable thing hasn't been working for me no posts for sonja...

the past few days have been dreary indeed, and i spent a majority of them holed up in my room...either napping or staring aimlessly at the television.

today had the markings of a pretty good day...silliman actually wasn't an asshole and let us out early...i watched vampire hunter d...and thought i would give la blue girl a that was a rather interesting anemae. would have liked it...i see now why bill bought it...when he was at sea....or was he?? urg.

i need a nap and work on my paper, but i don't think that is going to happen. bill was supposed to come up tonight, but i dunno when, but he also wanted to cook...

i think i'll take a shower

::: posted by Sonja at 5:03 PM

Wednesday, April 03, 2002 :::
i guess some posts got lost...

::: posted by Sonja at 5:59 PM

Sunday, March 31, 2002 :::
behind billy's house tonight the peepers are out in full force...just a thought to make you smile.

i feel selfish right now. i want him to be ALL mine, even though i get time with him...but today, even though we were together, i felt alone. do you ever get that feeling of being alone in a room full of friends and laughter? that you are there, but you are not a part of it all...merely an observer who doesn't matter that much at all? a watcher from a different plane of existence?

even though today was SO beautiful outside, i felt dreary. i could not for the life f me find something pretty in our dinky little mall that made me smile even a little bit. all the colors were too harsh and the styles were either too short or too dowdy for my liking...urg. but i got a sketchbook...i have already filled a few pages with fantasy people, who i wish i was more like. the boldness that comes with carrying a sword is something i wish i had...the figures that come with living in the outdoors i wish i had too. i guess you can say i am having a fat day. no matter how pretty i am told i am or how perfect or how wonderful i am....i cannot believe it right now. i don't feel perfect. i do not feel pretty. i just want to shed tears on a welcoming shoulder.

how depressing this all is. i am sure i will delete this in the morning.

::: posted by Sonja at 12:18 AM


this is useless rambling of a bored college student...this is where i vent!

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